I mean, yeah, thanks for loving me and everything, but if we are being real here…
1. Thank you for continuing to pretend Chipotle is healthy.
2. Thank you for letting me choose to post the photo of us that is very clearly the one that’s better of me.
3. Thank you for every time you had to forcefully pretend to be BFFs with one of my friend’s significant others. I know my friends don’t always have the best taste, so you’re a trooper.
4. Thank you for being way too comfortable about gross topics with me. I’m glad we put the whole boundaries concept to rest a long time ago.
5. Thank you for dodging people at the store with me when I don’t want to see them. You’re the best secret-agent partner I could ever ask for.
6. Thank you for sharing food with me, even when I originally acted like I didn’t want it and then changed my mind when you got it…
7. Thank you for dealing with my drunken antics.
8. Thank you also for dealing with my tired and hungry antics, because they may be worse than drunken ones at times.
9. Thank you for entertaining me on long car rides that would otherwise cause me to contemplate suicide.
10. Thank you for watching crappy TV with me.
11. Thank you for being too dorky and honest to ever make me question your faithfulness to me.
12. Thank you for letting me sleep in. Literally, I’m not sure if anything else reinforces my love for you quite like that does.
13. Thank you for knowing what to say when I’m cranky. You never walk in to the war zone unprepared; such a brave soul.
14. Thank you for any partial ways you’ve adopted loyalty to my sports teams.
15. Thank you for not judging me when I wear the same sweats around the house for like a week straight.
16. Thank you for putting up with my family when they are being extra annoying.
17. Thank you for putting up with me when I am being extra annoying.
18. Thank you for pretending to be surprised when I clearly already gave it away.
19. Thank you for embracing the power of my elite dancing and singing skills.
20. Thank you for always being the person I can count on for the “Let’s get the heck out of here” eye-contact at a party we are completely over being at.
21. Thank you for back massages. Wow, thank you for back massages.
22.Thank you for always being down for a lazy movie marathon, or any other random activity or adventure.
23. Thank you for telling it how it is. I need your honesty.
24. Thank you for listening to my music, even if you at times think it’s making your ears bleed.
25. Thank you for every time you randomly did little chores for me like grabbed the garbage bag or cleaned up the dishes at my messy apartment. REAL LOVE.
26. Thank you for letting my little relatives crawl all over you and nag you at family events.
27. Thank you for knowing the boundaries of PDA. I’m glad we aren’t “that couple.”
28. Thank you for being tastefully cheesy (no pun intended).
29. Thank you for never having a problem with laughing at yourself, or me, or us. I mean, we do some pretty ridiculous crap. Laughing is a must.
30. Thank you for being as competitive and absurdly involved in the games we play against each other as I am. Nothing is more sexy than someone who never backs down from a game of Guess Who.
31. Thank you for being my best friend. Thank you for being the coolest person I know. Thank you for showing up, coming through, bringing laughter and exposing me to the better parts of life.
32. Oh, and thank you for never burning the popcorn. Popcorn burners are the worst kind of people.